The Many Faces Within: Exploring Parts and Protectors in IFS

Protectors can be viewed as guardians for the wounded parts inside.

In the last post, we discussed the concept of "parts" in Internal Family Systems (IFS) and how each part has a role and a positive intent. This post will delve deeper into the distinction between parts with healthy roles and those with extreme roles, and how these "protector" parts can take over, or "blend" with, our sense of self.

Healthy Roles vs. Extreme Roles: A Matter of Perspective

IFS distinguishes between parts with healthy roles and those with extreme roles. A part with an extreme role has, based on past experiences, adopted behaviors, perceptions, and feelings that are no longer accurate or helpful. They're not interacting with the world as it is, but rather with a distorted version based on past hurts and traumas.

Think of it like wearing tinted glasses. A part with distorted perceptions might see danger where there is none, leading to an extreme reaction. A part with distorted beliefs about themselves or the world ("I am weak," "The world is dangerous") will react differently to a situation than a healthy part with a more balanced and accurate self-perception. Similarly, a part holding onto old pain or anger will color current experiences with those intense emotions. And a part with distorted behaviors, perhaps one that hasn't realized you're no longer a child, will react with outdated and potentially inappropriate strategies.

The Origins of Extreme Roles: A Story of Protection

These extreme roles often arise from a place of positive intent. The part is trying to protect us, even if its methods are ultimately harmful. Imagine a young boy who performs poorly on a test, is scolded by his parents, and feels deeply ashamed. A part of him might develop the extreme role of a "striver," vowing never to feel that shame again. This part might push him to work relentlessly, even to the point of exhaustion, in any situation that resembles a test or judgment.

Over time, this "striver" part might become so ingrained that it seems like the only way to be. The individual might describe feeling like a robot or alien when this part is active, experiencing joylessness and a detachment from their body. This part, symbolized perhaps by an "alien" image, becomes a protector, shielding the system from the pain of past experiences.

Protectors: Guardians of the Inner World

In IFS, these parts that take on protective roles are called protectors. They try to prevent us from experiencing the pain we've endured in the past. However, their extreme roles and distorted perceptions can lead to problems. Our "alien" protector, for example, might perceive even minor situations as threatening, triggering intense feelings of anxiety and requiring excessive effort. They might also develop distorted beliefs about the world, such as "everyone is judging me." This can lead to distorted behaviors, like working excessively even when it's not necessary.

Most of the problematic behaviors, feelings, and beliefs we experience stem from these protector parts with extreme roles and distorted perceptions. They're the source of much of our suffering. Yet, it's crucial to remember that they're acting out of a desire to protect us. They've taken on the burden of preventing past pain from ever happening again.

Blending: When a Part Becomes "Me"

A very important concept in IFS is blending. This is when a part takes over the system, and we become that part. It's not just that the part is active; we identify with it completely. Our thoughts, feelings, perceptions, and behaviors are all aligned with that part.

Let's revisit our "striver" example. Imagine the individual is at work and receives a message from their boss. Suddenly, the "alien" protector takes over. It's not that the individual is consciously thinking, "I need to work really hard now." Instead, they become the striving part. Their body tenses, they feel fear, they're convinced they'll lose their job if they don't perform perfectly, and they begin working obsessively. They're no longer separate from the part; they are the part in that moment.

Another common example is procrastination. We don't necessarily decide to procrastinate; a part takes over, and we find ourselves automatically engaging in distracting activities. There's no conscious deliberation; it just happens.

The Inner Critic: Another Protector

Often, when one protector part has been active, another one steps in afterward, usually in the form of a critic. This critic might berate us for our actions: "Why did you procrastinate?" or "Why did you work so hard?" Maybe even using the dreaded "You should..." statement that pushes so many people. While the critic's intention might be to prevent us from repeating those behaviors, its method of criticism is rarely helpful.

These rapid shifts from one part to another highlight the multiplicity within us. They demonstrate how different parts have different intentions and can take over at different times. This is a common experience, and it's what IFS aims to address.

Working with Our Parts: A Path to Healing

IFS recognizes that we all have these parts, including protector parts with extreme roles. This is normal. And it's something we can work with. IFS therapy is designed to help us understand these parts, heal the wounds that led them to adopt extreme roles, and help them find healthier ways to protect us. In the next post, we'll explore more about how IFS works with these parts to create inner harmony and healing.